IaHB FM's In a Downbeat Hour, Broadcast 2
by Mad Cow
Summary: IT RETURNS!!!!


Guess you people loved me enough to read the second installment, eh? ;) Well anyway, here I am, the Cow in your house broadcasting all over the world (Does anyone else find my phrase as lame as I do?). Well, I've got a real treat for everyone...not only have we got Darkchilde in the studio all pumped to do an interview with Jamie, we've got Jamie in the studio (Yaaaay!)!! But that's later. Right now we've got a song called 'Cuties of the EMT Station' by Darkchilde, to the tune of Queen's 'Princess of the Universe', so stick around! 

_Here we are, longing to be doctors, We're the cuties of the EMS Station_   
_Here we work, helping those to survive when their hurt with the best of equipment___

_And here we are, we're the cuties of the EMS Station,_   
_Here we work, helping those through survival_   
_We're hoping to help you live in this world_   
_I am a teenager, I have seen more blood then most_   
_We're too cute to be true, no man is our equal_   
_We're are the future doctors of the world!___

_Longing to be docs, the cuties of the station_   
_Hoping and praying, getting out of paper work_   
_Tyler wants Val's love, but he won't take a stand_   
_We're here to be the cuties of the EMS station!___

_Most adults don't understand, their lives could one day rest in our hands_   
_Oooh, ooooh, oooh_   
_Teens talk about us, tell us we're a bunch of freaks_   
_We're the ones that will go far, we'll be making millions while they make peanuts_   
_With our EMT certifications held high_   
_Only Jamie passed the test the first time_   
_We don't care if people talk about us, we hear it everyday_   
_But we'll prove them wrong, if it's the last thing we do!_   
__ __

_Yeah, yeah, alright! Watch that ambulance fly!_   
_Stop, that was a hurt kid!___

_Here we are, longing to be doctors. We're the cuties of the EMS Station_   
_Here at the station we belong_   
_Longing to be docs, Cuties of the EMS Station, hoping and trying_   
_Got your life in my hands_   
_Jamie wants Caitie's love, and maybe HE'LL make his stand___

_We were born to be the cuties of the EMS station!_

Alrighty, here's another Mad Cow original, 'We're Crashing', to the tune of SR-71's 'Right Now'. 

_He screech around like he's insane_   
_Very small pinkish planes_   
_Believe we do know pain_   
_When Hank's the driver!___

_So what if he's our leader?_   
_We're caught in an eggbeater_   
_Hope St. Peter ain't our greeter_   
_When Hank's the driver!___

_Why you drive like you are high_   
_Knock us down Val now has a black eye_   
_Figured you may be certified_   
_But you drive like you're one messed up guy.___

_You used to be my best friend_   
_Trusted you until the end_   
_But I fear for my life_   
_When you're the driver___

_I once gave you my trust_   
_Now fear is just the crust_   
_In your car I learned you cuss-oh shit_   
_We're crashing___

_I used to have all my limbs___

_He screech around like he's insane_   
_Very small pinkish planes_   
_Believe we do know pain_   
_When Hank's the driver!___

_Why you drive like you are high_   
_Knock us down Val now has a black eye_   
_Figured you may be certified_   
_But you drive like you're one messed up guy._   
__ __

Hi Everybody! This is the Childe of Darkness herself, Darkchilde, coming at you LIVE from In a Downbeat Central! (Or you know, whatever it's called). My very good friend and fellow in mate at the asylum, Mad Cow, agreed to let me interview Mr. Jamie Waite! Woo hoo!! (And it's not even my birthday!) Hi Jamie, it's nice to meet you. 

**It's nice to meet you too.**

So, getting right to my first question--when are you going to ask out Caitie? 

**Uh...Caitie's just my friend. I don't want to ask her out.**

Liar!! I can TELL! You LIKE HER! YOU LIKE HER! 

***looks sorta scared* Umm...well, I do like her, but not like that. She's just my friend.**

*DC crosses arms over chest and pouts, her lower lip quivering* Not FAIR! how come none of the couples *I* like never get together!? *shakes herself out of depression* But anyway...hey, does this mean your single? 

**Uh, actually, yes I am.**

SO, what do you look for in a girl? I know that all those single ladies out there are just dying to know! 

**Well, I want a girl that I can be friend with first, some one who understand me, and I can have a good time with.**

AND HOW EXACTLY IS THAT DIFFERENT FROM WHAT YOU HAVE WITH CAITIE!?!? 

**Okay, I'm sorry, but your totally freaking me out with this whole me and Caitie being a couple thing. I think I'm going to go now...**

Wait!! You haven't told me if you were going to ask her out yet!! *door slams* Oh, grrr! He's gone! And I didn't even get to ask him if he liked slightly TALLER brunettes either! *pouts again* Oh well! Join me next time when I get to (hopefully) interview Caitie Roth! (Well, that is, if Mad Cow lets me do this again!) Until then, this is Darkchilde, the Childe of Darkness, signing off! Up next, we've got a song by Mad Cow, 'We Try To Save Lives', to the Tune of Vertical Horizon's 'Everything You Want'. Adieu! 

_Somewhere there's sirens_   
_And we're pulling in_   
_To save the lives of someone who's hurt_   
_We always try hard_   
_But sometimes we fail_   
_But we do our best anyway_

_But despite our work and our care_   
_Sometime there are ones that we can't save_   
_We cry and we sob_   
_Sob and wait for the echoes of sirens for our next call___

_We try to save lives_   
_We try to good_   
_And live our lives the way teenagers should_   
_We drive our ambulance all through the night_   
_If you say we need a life, I don't know why.___

_We're waiting to put_   
_Our fractured lives together_   
_It seems that everything else's on hold_   
_There's always another_   
_Call that's just hover_   
_There's always time for another accident today___

_We try to save lives_   
_We try to good_   
_And live our lives the way teenagers should_   
_We drive our ambulance all through the night_   
_If you say we need a life, I don't know why.___

_We'll just sit tight_   
_Stay awake takes might_   
_It's only one less hour to sleep_   
_And we just do right_   
_There's no sleep tonight_   
_And hope we'll have time in the morn___

_Out of the station_   
_Onto the open road_   
_Past the place_   
_Of the MVA_   
_I never did notice, but I still hide away_   
_The echoes of children we didn't save___

_We try to save lives_   
_We try to good_   
_It's impossible to live our lives the way teenagers should_   
_We drive our ambulance all through the night_   
_If you say we need a life, I don't know why._   
_I have no_   
_Life___

Before we have some more songs, lets have a commerical, eh? 

**Do you have anything you want to submit? Anything at all, a song, a parody, an interivew, a shout out, pointless rambling, an ad? Send it in to vladimirthedancinghampster...I need anything you've got!******

**Fan Fiction Writer: Man, I'm tired**   
**Reader: This mouse makes my hand hurt**   
**Narrator: Is life just wearing you down? Well never fear, Tyler's Mommie's Homemade Cookies are just the thing! You can use them for anything and everything. To eat, a doorstop, a coaster, a paperweight! The possibilites are endless!**   
**Fan Fic Writer: But what about my pesky little sister? She's always messing up my things!**   
**Narrator: Now we have Tyler's Mommie's Homemade Cookie Dough! Perfect for throwing at siblings, using as a pillow, eating...they even make cool bracelets!**   
**Reader: Wow! I need to get me some of Tyler's Mommie's Homemade Cookies!**   
**Fan Fic Writer: Me too!******

Don't ask. That's all I have to say. Don't ask. Anyway, here's another great song from your friend and mine, Darkchilde, 'Ow! I Broke it Again!' To the tune of Britney Spear's 'Oops! I Did It Again!' 

_Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow_   
_Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow___

_I think I broke it again_   
_Tripped over my feet, now my arm's got a funny bend_   
_Oh man..._   
_I think my wrist's crushed_   
_I really hope it's not serious!_   
_Quick someone call the EMT's to help me_   
_Ouchie ouchie!___

_OWWW! I broke it again!_   
_I stepped on the cat, and fell on my hand_   
_Oh kitty, kitty_   
_Oww! I'm in real pain!_   
_Can some one help me?_   
_Call... an... ambulance!___

_You see, my problem is this_   
_I'm a really big klutz,_   
_And that's dangerous, cause my insurance won't pay!_   
_I cry, as the ambulance arrives_   
_And three cute guys climb out_   
_Hello! I broke my arm..._   
_Could please help me?_   
_Whoa baby...___

_OWWW! I broke it again!_   
_I stepped on the cat, and fell on my hand_   
_Oh kitty, kitty_   
_Oww! I'm in real pain!_   
_Can some one help me?_   
_Call... an... ambulance!___

_"Okay, let's load her up!"_   
_"Here miss, we're going to give you this pain reliever."_   
_"Oh my gosh...I love you, really, I love you."_   
_ "Ma'am, could you please let go of my neck?"_   
_"She's just grateful Jamie."_   
_"Yeah, that's it! Grateful!"_   
_"But I'm having a hard time *erck* breathing!"___

_OWWW! I broke my arm again!_   
_But three cute guys really saved me_   
_Owww! I like being a klutz now,_   
_Cause these three are EMTs!_   
  
_OWWW! I broke it again!_   
_I stepped on the cat, and fell on my hand_   
_Oh kitty, kitty_   
_Oww! I'm in real pain!_   
_Can some one help me?_   
_Call... an... ambulance!_   
  
Alrighty folks, here's the moment you've all been waiting for (not). Here's Mad Cow with her version of the Meaty Cheesy Boy's song 'Ultimate Cheeseburger', 'Ultimate EMT' 

_Boy, you know there's one thing I love_   
_But it's not you I'm thinking of_   
_I want to see a hot EMT!___

_Break some ribs!___

_E MT E MT E and that's it_   
_Boy you know they're in sexy suits_   
_And they won't come until we call___

_I'm not lyin', I hear sirens, meant to satisify_   
_I'm sure you'd understand it better_   
_If you broke your wrist like I_   
_Maybe someday I'll want you back_   
_But until then, boy please_   
_I'm begging you to go so I can see my EMT!___

_When I say E you say MT_   
_E!_   
_MT!_   
_E!_   
_MT!___

_Boy I know you're a Scientologist_   
_But I'll get medical help until the end_   
_If I can just see the hot EMTs___

_E MT E MT E and that's it_   
_I'd break my wrist if it could mean I could get one kiss___

_I'm not lyin', I hear sirens, meant to satisify_   
_I'm sure you'd understand it better_   
_If you broke your wrist like I_   
_Maybe someday I'll want you back_   
_But until then, boy please_   
_I'm begging you to go so I can see my EMT!___

_When I say E you say MT_   
_E!_   
_MT!_   
_E!_   
_MT!___

_You're a sexy guy_   
_Don't get me wrong_   
_I'd want you back_   
_But with EMTs my heart belongs___

_I'm not lyin', I hear sirens, meant to satisify_   
_I'm sure you'd understand it better_   
_If you broke your wrist like I_   
_Maybe someday I'll want you back_   
_But until then, boy please_   
_I'm begging you to go so I can see my EMT!___

_When I say E you say MT_   
_E!_   
_MT!_   
_E!_   
_MT!___

Hum de dum. If anyone has actually ever heard that song, don't expect the tunes to match up, because I've never actually heard the song, just read the lyrics! :D Before I go on with the next song, I'd like to make a quick announcement: I lost all of the e-mails from people who wanted the invite to Bleacher Junkies N Pretty Perfects...if you sent one to me and haven't recieved an invite, please e-mail me again! Thankee! :D   
Anyway it's been fun, but I have to leave you now (hey, there's six songs! I broke last time's record...maybe next time, if more people send stuff in *hint, hint* I can shoot for seven!). Up next we've got Darkchilde's "I Still Haven't Found the EMT I'm Looking For' to the tune of U2's "I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For" This is Mad Cow signing off...BLEACHER JUNKIES RULE!! 

_I have looked through every window_   
_I have run from scary dogs_   
_Only to find my EMT_   
_Only to find my EMT___

_I have bleed_   
_I have called 911_   
_I have scaled Kingsport's walls_   
_Only to find my EMT___

_But I still haven't found that gorgeous EMT I'm looking for_   
_But I still haven't found that gorgeous EMT I'm looking for___

_I want to kiss his sexy lips_   
_I want to be healed at his fingertips_   
_He's a real hottie_   
_Oh he's my desire___

_I have asked all I have seen_   
_I wanna know where that cutie pie is_   
_He warms up my nights_   
_I wish he'd kiss me until I was out cold___

_But I still haven't found that gorgeous EMT I'm looking for_   
_But I still haven't found that gorgeous EMT I'm looking for___

_I know I'll find him someday_   
_He can't hide forever, and then we'll be one_   
_Then we'll be one_   
_Oh, he can't run forever___

_I'll break into his house_   
_And wrap him in chains_   
_Oh I'll lock him in my basement_   
_Of my house_   
_Of my house_   
_You know I'll do it!___

_But I still haven't found that gorgeous EMT I'm looking for_   
_But I still haven't found that gorgeous EMT I'm looking for_   
_But I still haven't found that gorgeous EMT I'm looking for_   
_But I still haven't found that gorgeous EMT I'm looking for___

**Comming up next time: A Parody of Fastball's 'You're an Ocean', hopefully someone besides Darkchilde will submit (Not that I don't love your stuff, DC!), and Darkchilde will interview Caitie...be afraid...be VERY afraid! MWHAHA! MWHAHA! MWHAHAHA-*cough, cough***


End file.
